Way Too Gay To Function.

As I’ve written on my last post, I told you that I am still completing my puzzle. I’ve had these questions in my mind – questions that typically everyone would definitely ask themselves as they mature. What am I here for? Yea. I still don’t know. I’m glad for my “parallelo” – Kris that he already found his own answers. Or like for Paul – that I know he’s getting there. Or maybe for some of my friends who are married and now have cute lil angels they can call theirs. Or for some of my colleagues who have passed the recently board exams for architecture. Or for some expats here who knew right there and then that working here in the “land of opportunities” is indeed an obvious response. But as for me, can a series of buntong hininga would do? . . .

Everyday I ask myself; hey did you figure it out yet dumd head! But I know I haven’t. So I confronted Kris about this the other day. He asked me [um Kris, should I use she instead of he??]: do you ever find yourself happy every time I nailed a good design back in college? So I said: of course! [I would be plastik if I said no!] Because it would look good on my transcript! Haha Kidding aside any compliment is worth a grin! And it’s always a nice feeling anyways. [: And she asked me again: What are the things that you do that you felt you were really happy doing it? I’m afraid I have to answer that.

I am afraid not because I do not have the answer. I don’t know sometimes I am just afraid to claim it. But I will try to start to be courageous here. Little by little. And maybe some of you can help me find the answers along the way. . . But please I would appreciate it if you don’t leave comments this time, as if this post was ever written and published! Por favor?!

Ugh this is going to be hard on my part. See, I am still having a hard time writing it—err typing it! First, let me answer the hanging question Kris left me with;

Actually there are two things that I did before that I felt genuinely ecstatic about. One, performing. Two, the mahaderra photo shoots.

I can’t say I’m a “closet performer” because honestly I did perform on some pretty huge events or functions or even barrio fiestas [haha]. It is still a classic feeling that until now I can’t even find the right adjective to describe how it was.

Deal with the butterflies.

Singing – I fronted and collaborated with local bands in our town before. And I tell you, even if we just did a cover of those songs and even if the venue is more low-key, twas an amazing feeling pulling it through! I remember practicing it every night in my dorm just to give justice to the songs! Even if I sing back up vox back in college, it still gives me goose bumps every time I hit the right notes. Those were remarkable memories that I treasure. I can still remember those days every now and then. The lights. The weather. The people watching. Clapping. Hating me. Telling me that I suck. And it just takes one person, tapping my back, and telling me it was all fine. Next thing I knew I was smiling. [:

I even downloaded those songs and put it in my playlist now and every time I hear it I get to sing along with it! Good thing I still know the lyrics [:

Bass playing – if I cannot express how I felt every time I do sing how much more when I play bass? I love it! Really! Playing the bass puts me in a different trance. I learned playing bass back in Hs and continued playing till college but I have to regulate it because the scheds are tough [you know I have to be in school in the morning and bedroom-lamay-drafting in the evening]. I know I didn’t quit, but I have to give way to my studies. So after college I thought I was free to do basically whatever I want. I was back with my former band – Furblind, practiced twice a week and do gigs on weekends. But I landed on day jobs that have kept me to stay long hours in the office [you know construction and architectural boo hoos] and so I quit. Sad thing. I haven’t played in like two years now. Err two and a half maybe. Haven’t even played the guitar in weeks now. But every time I do, I still recall the riffs that I’ve been playing before akin to the flea-or-lalay-like riffs! [hihi yabang] Or if I have time I make sipra some riffs of songs that I am interested with.

Poor me I had to make a choice back then. Can you say it was a bad one??

Behind the camera.

And as I moved on on being a frustrated bassist I enjoyed taking retratos even if I do not have the amazing gadgets available. I always dream and envy Mallari’s Sony Dslr even if we can’t figure out what the icon was for because it was written in Japanese! If Kris enjoyed styling the models, and that models would definitely be Kat M. or Kay B. or anybody in TS including [ehem] me, well I definitely have the benefit of seeing their beauties on the lenses! It’s blissful when I see the outcome of each photograph. It was even flattering being part of the mahaderra shoots [wala lang to underground trip lang ng TS pag nakainom]!

Till then I never stopped taking snaps when I can. Capture every moment. Good or bad. Even if I only know how to point and shoot using the lowest reso cam there is. Chamba na siguro kapag maganda ang moment! And still dreams big of owning a decent Dslr and taking notes from professionals and friends [:



So watyatink piknik?!?

Is it really one’s obligation to find its own destiny? Will the things that make you happy matters in the end? Or we already know the answers, we’re just afraid of it???

Whatever, I’ll just keep dreaming! [:

Long-time-no-write!

I’ve been looking for an alternate thing to do before sleeping at nighttime so that I will not force myself to read another book because when I do my eyes strain which leads to terrible headache the next morning! Haven’t been back to the opto though.. hihi Lazy mee! So, I’ve been hooked with – guess what! Dvd marathoning! Hehe if there’s such word! That means one movie a night. Or maybe two. [:

Last night I watched August rush. And honestly this is the second time I cried over a movie. The first was I am Sam. I didn’t expect that much in this movie though. I thought it was the typical movie. And though some parts of the movie were flashbacks I found out twas interesting at first.. and moving in the latter. I love Evan – the child wonder whom I find adorable and such a sweet soft spoken baby, the soundtrack, the way the movie uses music as the medium for the child to find his own parents and believed that he communicates with them through it and the hands who portrayed Evan’s for the guitar parts. Kika King is such a guitar god! Ok, I know I don’t have to relate to you the plot of the story. Let me just share this to you. . .

My favorite part of the film was when Evan aka August Rush [Freddie Highmore] unintentionally met his biological father – Louis [Jonathan Rhys Meyers] in the park where Wizard [Robin Williams] just forced him to leave the rehearsals of the philharmonic orchestra and let him play there instead to earn money. The scene where they exchanged guitars [Evan plays a Gibson dreadnought; haven’t found the guitar model for Louis though.. but I’ll take a guess it’s Yamaha! hehe] and both played the “dueling guitar” [i'm not quite sure if this is the title]. For me, it’s like hey Evan you have finally found him! [: I know, it’s kind of predictable in some point but I was moved when Louis asked Evan why he won’t play in the concert that night . . . and he told Evan :

“You never quit on your music. No matter what happens. Coz anytime something bad happens to you, that’s the one place you can escape to and just let it go. I
learned it the hard way. And anyway, look at me. Nothing bad’s gonna happen.

You gotta have a little faith.”

Brave kiddo. He went to the concert. He believed in the stranger/Louis/his father. And still believed that music can bring back his family together. And so he did! End of story --- hehe sabi ko naman predictable ending di ba [: and I don’t care if some would have claim it that the movie was too lame, poorly acted, or uber cheesy. Because it definitely hit me like a big yellow school bus! It’s about keeping the faith on what you believe in. Holding on. Patiently living. And being courageous. So now i've come into thinking, i am still on the process. I’m still completing my puzzle. And I’ll let you know when I ‘m done.

And the outro goes a lil sumthin like this :

"The music is all around you, all you have to do is listen.”

- August Rush

Sometimes, you just need a little flick to shaken you up! And I am glad that I did [:

tee gang

I know I haven’t written anything other than rants for the past months and forgive me for that.. it’s just I really, really need an outlet for all these crappy things happening lately.. Anyways, I’m not gonna post another rant this time and I promise to lessen that [thank you!].

So just now I remember 21 days to go before the second part of the Heads reunion concert baby! En wat em ay stil duwing hir!!! Waa. Yes I know, I’m gonna miss this one again [bigtime]. Pero keri lang naman. Kita ko tix price – abay wagi! Napakamahal. I mean kung dito sa Dubai gaganapin un e mas keri lang yung 150 dirhams na mailabas mo sa bulsa mo di ba. Pero para gumastos ka ng ganun kalaki para sa isang konsert [oo alam ko hindi sila basta-basta] um, magdadalawang isip ka talaga.

Buti na lang last December eh nakapanuod ulit ako ng gig. Tagal ko din natigang sa gig kaya nung narinig namin na pupunta dito ang The Dawn, Pupil, Kami, at Bamboo e super bili agad kame ng tix. Biruin mo 65 dirhams lang yun ha may service shuttle pa papunta sa venue! Hehe oo alam ko malaki yun kung i-coconvert ko pero mura na yun para sa presyong Dubai! Tutal hindi naman talaga kailangang magconvert e ang mahalaga sulit na sulit ang gig! Kaya salamat sa tfc.. kahit naka-orbit kame! Haha

Unang nagperform ang Pupil. Siempre andun ang mahal na mahal ko na si Dok! Hehe at mukang ayus na rin si Ely nun mula nung inatake cia sa puso sa kasagsagan ng reunion concert ng heads sa pinas. Buti nga at naging ok na cia, ayus sumasayaw pa habang nagpeperform! Akala ko dati e isang kanta lang nila ang alam ko at yun ay ang peyborit kong Dulo ng dila, pero sa bawat pyesang tugtugin nila e napapasabay ako! Salamat sa mg panahong nakakapakinig pa ko ng NU sa pinas habang nagtatrabaho! Ayun halos makabisado ko rin pala ang mga kantang Monobloc, Disconnection notice, at Sala. Sarap ng set nila lasang baskin robbins! Haha ganun kasarap! Tumugtog pa sila ng mga lumang pyesa – mga kanta ng Heads, Teeth, at Barbie’s Cradle kung saan sila unang nagsimula bago mabuo ang bandang Pupil.

Sumunod na tumugtog ang Kamikazee. And knowing Kami, haler ang baklang si Jay! Alam ko na magiging magulo ang set nila yung tipong pang comedy bar! Haha Sobrang namiss ko ang bandang to! Kaya habang tumutugtog sila e di ko maawat ang utak ko na mag flashback sa mga panahong nanunuod kame sa Mayric’s o kaya ng UP fair tuwing Pebrerow. Aw. Ganun pa rin sila mag perform – makulit, magulo, at ubod ng saya na may hingal factor sa dulo! Kaso kulang sila non, hindi na nakatugtog si Led dahil nahuli “daw” sa airport na may “kargada”. Pero kahit kulang sila ng isang gitarista e ayus pa rin naman ang tunog nila! Buti nga nasakyan ng mga nanunood yung mga kababuyan ni Jay! Hehe Di naman kasi lahat eh kilala ang Kami lalo na dito sa Dubai. Mas marame kasi ang nagaabang kay Bamboo! Haha. Galeng. Sana maka score din ako ng bagong album pag uwi ko! [:

The Dawn naman ang sumunod pagkatapos ng napakakulit na set ng Kami. Pahinga kumbaga! Pero tila ba mas maraming nakasabay sa The Dawn – siguro kasi marame na rin yung may edad sa crowd! Hehe Pero wala naman sa edad yun di ba. Dahil kahit ako masasabi ko na malupit pa rin sila! Kahit yung mga bago nilang kanta o kahit pa mga remakes nila! Panalo. Kaya lalong tuloy-tuloy na flash back ito! Siempre para sakin Enveloped ideas parin ang peyborit ko. At sa mga remakes nila e yung Message in a bottle. Nakakatuwa nga yung mga kabayan na nanuod non, kasi hindi sila mga bastos di gaya saten. Naikompara ko talaga yun. Kahit kasi alam ko na gigil na gigil na yung crowd na makita ang Bamboo e pinakinggan parin nila yung ibang banda gaya ng The Dawn. At wala akong narinig na may nagsabing – “bumaba ka na jan Sweet!!” [peace tayo ser!] Yan naman e naririnig ko lang date kapag nanunood ako ng mga malalaking gig sa Pinas. Bow parin ako senyo mga Ser! [:

At siempre huling nagperform ang Bamboo. Ang bandang pinakahihintay ng halos lahat ng nanuod sa DFC open grounds! Ganun pa rin naman sila - Mahal ko pa rin si Nathan, Malupit pa rin mag rolling si Vic, Suplado pa rin si Bamboo, at Gwapo pa rin si Ira [nga lang pilay cia nun!] Haha Peyborit ko yung Kailan na latest released single nila nung time na yun. Pero iba ang feeling nung kinanta nila yung Noypi. Siguro kasi feel na feel din namin dahil ofw kame ngaun! Haha Iba. Kinilabutan ako. Iba talaga kapag malayo ka sa lugar kung saan ka nagmula – kaya lahat ng mga simpleng bagay madali mong ma-appreciate…

Sana sa susunod indie bands naman [:

A S A ka tuts!

Onga pala maligayang araw ng jerjeran! Hehe Be safe guys! Spread the love [:

O edi eto na nga ang chika!

Abay walang habas na pagkakaltas na naman ang ginagawa ng mga hinayufek na taong to! Sobrang asar at galit pati poot isama mo na! Lintek! Ang laking pera na nun kapag ipinadala sa pinas! Shet na malagket. Kaya kahit wala ako/kame sa sariling bansa – super welga ang mga lola mo!! Siempre wala nga lang halong plakards! Haha. Pero ikot pwet nila amo kaninang umaga! Abay ni isang designer wala silang inabutan sa opisina. Oo alam ko mali iyon. Mali na hindi kame nagpaalam or kahit paepek man lang na may sakit kame. Ayaw na naming magpaliguy-ligoy pa! Diretso. Matapang. Sugod. Startalk. [:

At least neng naramdaman nilang mawalan ng designer di ba? Sobra kasi ang tiwala nila sa sarili nila. E hindi naman nila kaya ang mga ginagawa namin. Bakit kasi kelangan ma-ere sila? Bakit hindi nila matanggap na kailangan nila kame? Edi kanina lumabas ang katotohanan! Belaat!

[ tawang kontrabida ]

Kung wala na kayong pondo para sa kompanya nyo, e bakit hindi nyo na lang kaya isara itong shemai na kompanyang to?? Hmpfpf.

Pabor pa nga yun eh libreng pamasahe pauwi may kasama pang isang buwan na sweldo.. Puede na noh?

Kaso eto ang senaryo.. Siempre ang mga matatalino kong amo e hindi naman papayag ng ganun. Di nila kakayanin ang gastos na ikansela kame kasama pati pamasahe. Haha di pa nga sila nababaliw noh akalain mo?! Kaya eto balik trabaho kame bukas at napagusapan na lang namin na tanggalin na lang ang “pangmalawakan” na yan upang hindi na kame mailagay sa sitwasyon – lagi na lang kasi kame. Kame. Kame na walang malay. Aruy!

Kaya sa mga umaasa na uuwi na ko sa nalalapit na panahon, pasensya na mga fans. Nadelay ang flight ng lola niyo! Pero wag kayong mag alala, mabilis lang ang oras, ang gabi, at ang araw dito sa Gitnang Silangan. Papasaan ba at magkikita-kita rin tayo. Basta ba hihintayin niyo ako mga fans! Miss ko na kayo sobra. Pa-kiss nga! Mwa.

Ayus?

Pahabol : Sa huli kame rin ang nagwagi! Yea! Kaso malimit na’to dahil bawal na ang “pangmalawakan”!

H a a y .

Playing God. Just Playing.

Ok, so the sarcasmo and the arrogance continue. People who may thought they are our “gods” and as if they are the owners of this effing company have once again wants to prove something upon them. It’s fine if you do not want to hear another rant from me of course but in times like these I am soo electrified to write. And rant. And write. Rant. Write. Haha. Cyberspace has been pretty accommodating accepting my rants on a regular basis! [ Grrreat! ] Plus, I know Kris will be very much willing to hear this so here’t goes. . .

Early morning we arrived at the office, ok we’re late.. it’s no big deal anyway because it’s a Saturday and nobody goes to work early on Saturdays right. Oh yes I know right! And when we get here “Kulot” and “Mata” were level 10 on the irate meter – God I have no idea why. They kept exchanging words on their language which of course we were clueless of whatever they were saying. They talked non stop, so fast, and as if they were eating every word that’s coming out of their mouths! Blah. Blah. Blahs. Haha. But you can tell they were pretty angry. Angry that while talking they can’t even breathe I thought they were going to die on the spot at that moment due to lack of air or choking or hypertension. That would be a nice scene as I can imagine it - the office being enveloped of their presence, dark clouds gathering and the rain is about to pour outside.. There are sharp lightning and thunderstorms, and in the middle of their dialogues ---chug! They fell on the parquet flooring and die. S i l e n c e. And then the four of us will be looking at them slowly, wondering why all of a sudden their mouths are shut. And then we’ll see them and their bodies are still warm but all we can do is stare in awe. Tss, all we can do is shake our heads in discontentment… Poor you!

Haha. Nice one I know! [Ooops, wait I’m having deja vu while writing this! Ugh.] So to continue, unfortunately they are still alive. And here are some of the rants the two gods have towards us:

1. “You people are not working, I wonder why you still have the nerve to go to the office…”
2. “All you do everyday is chat, chat,chat!!” [then he unplugged the network cable].
3. “You people know nothing. When you are asked about work you know nothing. Nothing. [screaming loudly]”
4. “You are being paid to slack off in the office..”

So while the angry outburst continues, I put on my headset and listened to my playlists. I do not have pending designs to work with or follow ups to follow up [haha] so I just planned to finish the bungalow house that has been pending on my 3dsmax. Then Jemm handed me over a little work – so little that I didn’t even exerted any effort, braincells, and sweat on it. It was logical and so drafting 101! I finished it before we had lunch and so I handed it back to her so she can check it and give it to the foreman for costings.

Now, it’s three o’ clock - thirty two minutes - and seventeen seconds reading in my watch. I am still in my headset. Still with my playlist. Still no connection to the world wide web. Still petix. And still enraged [here] about Kulot and Mata. I know one of these days they can read this. Or if one day comes that I cannot take any of their sarcasm and unwelcome criticisms about me or us towards work I am sure they’re gonna hear me say things like these;

Numero uno: I can’t help it that we’re popular! [haha Mean girls!] Why are you guys soo obviously jealous about us?
I’m sorry that you have to work with us.. and I’m sorry we have our BS marked on our foreheads that’s
why we do not have the same level of work. Of course we have our nerves to go to the office! You don’t even own it! It IS our office too.. and besides when we don’t come for work you guys kept ringing our mobiles as if it is a crime to be sick. Or you still compare it to you – that you still go to the office on Fridays! We are not as crazy as you to do something like that! That’s why it’s called R-E-S-T-D-A-Y because you’re not supposed to go to work. I assume you guys can spell! Or you can search for Mr. Webster and asked him if I’m right. Duh.

Numero Dos: Excuse me misters, we chat if we’re done with designs or estimation. And in case you see us chatting
while working we also see to it that we meet our deadlines! And we always meet them! I’m sorry we’re gifted. Ok we know nothing. Fine. If that’s what you need to believe in. Next time you need working drawings or 3d presentations for the clients feel free to borrow my space! And I’ll let you do it!! Besides, you know everything right? That’s the reason why our boss hired us in the first place! Because you can’t do eeeet!! Poor you, you can’t even draw a straight line! And I tell you, our penmanships are already treasures! Unlike yours!!!! Demmet.

Numero Tres: Attention to the UAE labor office: WE ARE THE BEING CHARGED FOR INTERNET
CONNECTION! Unbelievable? It’s happening! They started cutting fees from our salaries last month and hilariously speaking al zahi is the one and the only office doing This! Amp.

Numero Kwatro: You guys envy us because we slack off at work and you don’t.. but the reason we slack off is because
there are no works coming in! if there were then we won’t! I would be glad to just stay home and watch dvds instead but you will still force us to go to work! the hell!!


I hope I made myself clear here by now. Don’t you wait for the time that we clash! Because you’ll definitely hear all of those rants not just from me but from all of us! And next time you unplugged that cable again, make sure we have acquired amnesia that we do not remember how to put it back!

Come on man, you don’t have to envy us, or dictate us, or fight with us. Why don’t you try to work with us harmoniously? Or just try to be humble from time to time and look back to the times that you are still freshies in your own respective fields. Or you can just mind your own businesses as we mind ours!

You will not be gods. Not theirs. Not ours. Not ever.